Clue* (1985) 9.5, 8, 9, 26.5

      So, I didn't know what to watch one evening and someone said to me, "Watch Clue." I said to myself, "A movie based on a board game? I can't watch this. It's no better than watching Battleship." I even mentioned this to the person who suggested it, but she assured me that this was nothing like that. My first hint that this movie might contain more than meets the eye is when, on the DVD menu I was asked, "Would you like an ending to be chosen for you at random, or would you like all three endings?" Say what you will about the choose-your-own-adventure format, but at least the random option makes it interesting. I chose to watch all three, which might seem a cop-out, but I wanted to see all of it. If only for my admiring public...in Russia.
      So I gave this movie a 9.5 for wit, which a judgmental type like myself will automatically seem too high. I can assure, for a comedy with absolutely nothing of substance to say, except perhaps a brow-beating of the 50's, it is well-conceived and masterfully acted. Tim Curry leads the cast as Wadsworth the butler. He is as physical and crazy eyed as he is in his best work and spares no physical expense to be funny. Eileen Brennan as Mrs. Peacock, the senator's wife; Madeline Kahn as Mrs. White, the high society black widow; Christopher Lloyd as the loose-moralled former psychiatrist; Michael McKean as Mr. Green, the gay G-Man; Martin Mull as Colonel Mustard, the unscrupulous army research commander; and Lesley Ann Warren as Miss Scarlet, the madame of a D.C. brothel. In case the names sound silly, they're intended to be aliases for a group of people being blackmailed by Mr. Body. The board game is followed to the letter and a game is played out before your eyes, but with brilliant actors and exceedingly interesting characters. And then the three endings. Three very plausible and simple endings with different culprits and different twists, but some of the same well-crafted jokes. In a very real way, I cannot recommend this movie more highly, but that is just wit.
      The reason this movie is not breaking into my top 25 any time soon is that a) it has nothing to say so much. I took it only down to 8 because of the nice portrayal of the 50's from a typical 80's perspective. Interesting if nothing else. The wonder is the straight 9. Nothing to add or detract, but a solidly made movie overall. I appreciate that it